I don't know what is real when it comes to my husband.

There has been one overwhelming feeling though, and that has been the fact I don't think he really misses me.

Sure, he's trying to talk to me more. He's trying to work with me more. That said, I don't get the feeling that he really wants to be with me. I just hung up with him on the phone and he sounds so reassuring yet, is he telling me the truth?

How do you try and reunite your family when the key component is on the other side of the country?

I don't know. I am struggling to try and re-separate myself.

I have always had high expectations for myself and others. That is what teachers do. Its how we get our students to perform their best. That said, perhaps it is time to admit that when it comes to this relationship, I should stop expecting, stop feeling. Think only of myself and my kids.

Tonight I felt the abandonment twinge again.

Its the one feeling I would really like to never feel again.